the war club

Writer/Dickhead/Killer Whale Unenthusiast

20 Movies That Turn 20 This Year And Still Hold Up


1993 was a powerhouse year for the cinema, and these movies prove why.

1. Jurassic Park

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Animatronics? Check. Kids in peril? Double check. Neckerchiefs? It’s a Spielberg trifecta!

2. Dazed and Confused

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The fact that we all know the line from this scene makes it golden.

3.Tombstone

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Thanks to Val Kilmer’s Doc Holliday we were introduced to the term “huckleberry,” and still don’t know if it’s a real berry or not.

4. The Sandlot

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Because this movie rocks. Oh, and Wendy Peffercorn. 

5. Groundhog Day



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According to some internet mathematicians, Bill Murray’s character spends at least 33 years trapped in a time loop, which is how I felt watching Garfield.

5. Mrs. Doubtfire

imageOh, Robin Williams, what happened?

6. Robin Hood: Men In Tights

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Don’t act like when this comes on TV you don’t leave it on from wherever it is and watch it til the end.

7. Schindler’s List

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"Is that a hangnail? Can this day get any worse?!"

8. True Romance

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Brad Pitt uses a honey bear as a bong. That is all.

9. The Nightmare Before Christmas

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Because every December, chubby goth kids let their parents take them to Disneyland so they can experience The Nightmare Before Christmas-themed Haunted Mansion. Also, churros.

10. A Bronx Tale

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This film is chock full of sage advice like the one above, but also includes the “girl test” and the “fear vs. love” scene. 

11. What’s Eating Gilbert Grape

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"Sorry, you didn’t win Best Supporting Actor for this part, Leo, but you know who did?"

12. The Fugitive

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"Me! Mr. Tommy Lee Jones! And the movie ain’t even about me. I play the cop! Yee Haw!"

13. Hocus Pocus

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More like “Hocus Focus On All That Cleavage!” amiright?

14. Cool Runnings

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"Sanka!… you dead?" "Ya, mon." Classic.

15. Rudy

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Because this movie was made for all us “5 foot nothin’, 100 and nothin’s” that have “barely a speck of athletic ability.”

16. Rookie Of The Year

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Yes. Yes, he did.

17. Sleepless In Seattle

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"Eww, you have a kid? Date over!"

18. Falling Down

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As a Los Angeles native, this movie runs through my head every time I get in my car. Every. Single. Time.

19. Menace II Society

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Firmly believe that Heath Ledger’s Joker was based a on Larenz Tate’s nihilistic, sociopathic O-Dog. Well, at least the gun was.

20. Philadelphia

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"I think I feel a hangnail. Can this day get any worse?!"

9 Reasons HGTV Might Be Making You Insane

1. The guy from “Love It Or List It” haunts your dreams.

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"You’re going to list it, right? RIGHT?!"

2. You think that the Property Brothers aren’t actually twins.

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Totally cousins, I’m sure.

3. Every house on “House Hunters” has potential.

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Just needs some TLC!

4. Convinced you know the difference between all shades of white.

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Now that I look at it, eggshell is a bit much compared to ivory.

5. Everything in your place is now shabby chic.

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"What do you mean it looks like a grandma lives here? THIS IS HIP AND COOL! NO COOKIES AND MILK FOR YOU!"

6. You “understand” what Escrow is.

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No, you don’t.

7. Considering moving to Brazil based on one episode of “House Hunters: International.”

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Uh… Can you tell me the closest way to the beach?

8. Convinced there is hardwood floors under ALL carpet.

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I’m sure those stains didn’t seep through.

9. You refer to people’s faces as their “Curb Appeal.”

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11 Board Game Characters That Must Be Secret Perverts

1. Professor Plum - Clue

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I don’t think those are real glasses, sir. Or a real book. Or pipe. Stop looking at me like that. Wait, why is this door locked?

2. Mr. Monopoly - Monopoly

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Only a sexually depraved billionaire would have “Get Out Of Jail Free” cards at his disposal.

3. This Doctor - Operation

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He’s clearly wearing boxers and no shoes. ‘Nuff said.

4. This Dude - Stratego

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Fascinating two-handed strategy game? Where’s the other hand, bro?

5. Daddy - Don’t Wake Daddy

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From the look of things, the game should be called “Don’t Walk In On Daddy When He Has The Door Shut.” Also, that cat looks scarred for life.

6. Joel - Girl Talk

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"It’s raining out, girl. Why not come inside and have a root beer while I tell you about hanging with the Ski Club. I won’t bite, unless you want me to."

7. Mr. Mint - Candyland

I know what you’re thinking; Lord Licorice is the obvious lecher in Candyland, right?

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Wrong.

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I mean, who wears over-alls with turtlenecks? Danish librarians and perverts, that’s who, and I don’t think Mr. Mint is a Danish librarian.

8. Patrol Boat - Battleship

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You sneaky little bugger, always the last to get sunk. What’s that? You want to call it a draw and grab a few mimosas? I don’t think so, sailor.

9. The Orange Hippo - Hungry Hungry Hippos

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"…and that’s when Pink Hippo realized Orange had been staring at Green for quite some time, the appetite in his eyes hungry for something else."

10. Blank Tile - Scrabble

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"Come on, baby! I can be whatever you you need me to be. You complete me by letting me complete you.” Gross.

11. Everyone - Guess Who

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Guess who’s the pervert? All of them. Well, except Robert, who’s clearly uneasy in this group.

Kentucky ‘13

Almost Not Crazy: OVERHEARD MOVIE REVIEWS: Evil Dead

mikepostalakis:

This is the first in a new series of movie reviews I gather from eavesdropping on people near me.

Movie: Evil Dead

Location: Village Bakery. Atwater Village.

Reviewer: Guy on his cell phone with a friend. Girlfriend looks on while eating her oatmeal pancakes.

Yo, what’s up. Nothing. Saw Evil…

Please keep making theses.

Lilly Potter

Lilly Potter